A Curious Critic
by Sugarpony
Summary: After a heist, Kaitou Kid runs into a curious critic. What's this about twin-headed fire-breathing rage monster? Maybe this gem isn't worth it, after all...


AN: This story was actually written for a class at school. The assignment was to write a story where two of your favorite characters meet. Best. Homework. Ever. I thought I may as well share it, so I hope you all enjoy it!

Standard Disclaimer: Sugarpony does not own Magic Kaitou or Doctor Who.

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><p>A Curious Critic<p>

The rusty chain slid from the doors, clanging noisily on the ground, the cast-iron padlock no match for the lock-picking skills of the great Kaitou Kid. The white-clad figure vanished his tools and slipped soundlessly into the abandoned factory, cape billowing behind him. Safely inside, halfway across town from where Inspector Nakamori was leading his task force in a wild goose chase after one of his dummies (Really, they should know better by now!), the phantom thief pulled his prize from his suit jacket's inner breast pocket and examined it in the moonlight shining in through the high windows, smirking triumphantly. Virgo's Child certainly lived up to its reputation; the bright violet jewel sparkled radiantly, the faint outline of a childlike form revealed by the lunar light.

"Beautiful, isn't it?"

Kid most certainly did _not_ jump at the unexpected voice, and no one had any proof to the contrary. He quickly surrounded the jewel in his gloved hand, masking its reflected light. _Poker face, poker face!_ he chided himself, regaining his composure before turning to greet his unexpected guest. "It most certainly is," Kid easily agreed, confident smile in place. "And with whom do I have the honor of sharing this lovely sight tonight?"

"The Doctor," the stranger replied. "_Just_ the Doctor." The willowy man stepped forward out of the shadows where he had been previously concealed, blue and white sneakers gently slapping the dusty floor. A long brown coat swirled around his legs, covering a blue, pinstriped suit. He was smiling disarmingly, hands in his pockets. It was an odd appearance altogether, but still nowhere near as odd as the time Hakuba had shown up for class dressed in full Sherlock Holmes cosplay.

Kid elegantly tipped his top hat to the strange man. "It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, my dear Doctor, but I am afraid I really must be going. After all, it is getting quite late, and I simply must be fresh and well-rested for my next performance."

"Actually, I can't let you do that." The English accent rolled smoothly across the foreigner's tongue, and Kid was once again forcefully reminded of his blonde classmate, who _also_ had the annoying habit of sticking his nose into his night job. "You see," he continued, barely pausing for breath, "it's a bit of a long story–well, no, actually it's a rather short story, but you wouldn't understand most of it so there's really no point in telling it–but the basic gist of it is that the owners of that gem you've got there are absolutely _not_ going to happy when they learn it's gone missing. Well, I say owners, but they're really more like parents, and I say gem, but it's really more like an egg. Well, I say egg..."

The gentleman thief had by this point produced a deck of cards through which he was shuffling, and as the Doctor drifted off into his musing he took the opportunity to transform them one by one into his finely feathered assistants. "I do hate to interrupt, but as I've already said I have a schedule to keep, and so–" Quick as a flash, Kid broke off mid-sentence and had his card gun pointed directly at his opponent's chest, the clover charm hanging from his monocle swaying at the sudden movement. The Doctor had pulled from one of his pockets a thick metal instrument about the length of a pen and aimed it at the door from which Kid had entered.

"Oh, will you relax," the Doctor quipped, and the tip of the rod glowed blue and let off a low hum, "it's just a sonic screwdriver, completely harmless, see? Honestly, whatever happened to your 'no one gets hurt' policy? You know, that's something I've always admired about you." By now he had twirled the 'sonic screwdriver' through his fingers and replaced it with a flourish worthy of a skilled magician. "But really," he continued, "I do have to insist you give me that jewel you slipped into your sleeve two minutes ago, trust me when I say you _do not_ want to meet these parents, they take overprotective to a whole new level. Lots of destruction and mayhem, the Rhondarans are known as 'two-headed fire-breathing rage monsters' for a reason; nasty temper, that lot."

By this time Kid could honestly admit that he was severely put off his stride. _Poker face_, he reminded himself once again, firmly resolving to simply accept the man as an eccentric critic. "Two-headed fire-breathing rage monsters, hmm?" he mused, now juggling five smalls multi-colored balls one-handed, card gun tucked back into its hiding place. "I've got enough of those already, thanks. Well, luckily Virgo's Child isn't what I'm looking for after all, so I'll be sure to return it post haste. But for now, I must bid you adieu, my good sir." Catching the balls in his left and plucking his hat from his head with the other, Kaitou Kid took a sweeping bow and disappeared in a flutter of three dozen white doves.

"Argh! No!" The Doctor, now alone in the factory, rushed to the spot where the thief had last been standing, tangling his hands in his messy brown hair. "No, no, no! Come on, the Rhondarans won't wait two or three days for you to have your fun, it's their _baby_, for heaven's sake!" Unfortunately the young man had vanished quite completely, leaving only a few scattered feathers in his wake. The Doctor let out an aggravated sigh and hurried to the blue police box hidden in the far corner. As he plunged his hands into his massive pockets to fetch his key, however, he paused, rolling his eyes skyward and chuckling to himself.

"Kaitou Kid, you really are a fantastic showman, absolutely brilliant you are. It was a pleasure to have met you."

And Virgo's Child in hand, the Doctor stepped into his box and they both faded into the night, the horrendous sound of groaning and grinding metal signaling their departure.

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><p><span>AN<span>: I hope you all enjoyed my completed homework! Please drop a review and let me know what you think!

~Sugarpony


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